I almost titled my memoir Dear Rachael.
It makes a lot of sense-my book is a collection of letters to my best friend, Rachael.
But using her name, her story, to not only title but promote my story didn’t feel right.
I've been thinking for awhile about how I wrote my memoir about my friendship with Rachael, but I haven’t written about who she is to me on my blog. That’s the whole point of my memoir. I wrote letters to Rachael to fill her in on what she meant to me when we were growing up and what she has missed since she’s been gone. Part of me feels like I want to keep writing to her for me. Which I have done when I really need someone to talk to. But another part of me also wants to share that with you, my readers.
I met Rachael in 1997, when we started grade 8 together at O’Grady Catholic High School. She was the best friend I could have ever asked for and is unlike any other human I have ever known.
Best Friends Forever (2008)
Shameless plug: if you want to learn more about who she is and you don’t know already, definitely check out Letters to the Mountain. Ask me for a copy (I’ll sign it for you!) or check it out on Amazon. 🙂
There was a time after I met Brad that I remember telling him that he had become my best friend, but I asked him not to tell Rachael because she was my best friend, too. I struggled with having two! What a problem to have. I’ve had many friends come in and out of my life since then, a chapter that didn’t make the final cut of the book, actually. And I’ve had a hard time grieving those friendships that I’ve lost, for reasons out of my control.
I’ve come so far in my personal journey and I’ve learned to accept that some people are only meant to be in our lives for a finite amount of time.
So how about a blurb from Letters to the Mountain, the unpublished chapter?
Note: the “you” I speak to is Rachael, as this is written in the form of letters to her.
This is the last section from the missing chapter.
Each of the friendships that I have had and continue to have is so different. The people that I have accepted into my life and that are around for the long haul are so special. They accept me for who I am, aren't shy to call me out when it really matters, and make me feel like I'm living my life to the fullest even when the going gets tough.
I would be honoured to have them all as guests at an other-worldly dinner party, where my house is cleaned for me and the five-star dinner is cooked by someone else, with all of the special people in my life in attendance, you at one side, Brad at the other. Where we could laugh and eat and drink wine until our hearts and bellies were full. Where we could just be happy and appreciate each other for what we are, no dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. An opportunity to get that one last hug from you and be given one last chance to tell you how much you mean to me and how I will forever hold you in my soul. To introduce all of the people that I hold so dear to each other, Archer and Maverick included, and enjoy an escape from reality.
Most importantly, I would give anything for the chance to say a proper good bye. Though good bye is not the end, it is simply closure until we meet again.
I guess I write all of this because I am feeling nostalgic today. Not sad, I’ve come far enough that I’m able to think and talk about her without getting sad. Though that happens sometimes, still, too. My writing started way back in the day as personal notes in my journal and has evolved since then, but I think it will always remain a very personal thing to me. Even in fiction. I write because it is my own true way to express myself. And I felt like I needed an excuse to do that today.
In other news, today is the 90th blog that I have written this year. I'm actually on track to post 100 blogs before Christmas! I thought it would be a great opportunity to do a giveaway. If you’re not signed up for my newsletter, you’re going to want to do that. When the next one comes out (I try to send them monthly, as close to the first of the month that I can), I’ll be sharing the details of my Christmas give away. Sign up here if you haven’t already.
Do me a favour and do something for yourself today, find something your heart truly desires. Let me know what it is below. 🙂
We’re in charge of our own happiness. Go find it!